Heart'n'Soul

A truly long day, crammed with the pessimism born out of the games people play, had perched itself contentedly on my mind and there was suddenly nothing I looked forward to in tomorrow. It was a blank canvas - the one in front of me – and the one in my mind and my heart.

I was on my way back, and I saw you once again - just like I did everyday, in all your diverse avatars- incredibly stunning but never enticing enough to hold me and my thoughts. You stared back with the same alluring anticipation. But today there was something more to you. Something different, something just so... just something... and I decided to give you a chance.

I asked the cab driver to stop and got down. You watched me with your mystery laden face as I smiled and walked slowly towards you. I settled my bag on the bench, removed my shoes and climbed on the platform next to you. As I stood up and took a closer look at you, I realized what I had been missing, feeling glad to have let go of the inhibitions of being with you all alone.

You stirred a little as I gazed at you intently. With uncountable secrets hidden within, you finally seemed to smile at me. The life in that smile made me aware of the surreal backdrop of where I stood - the windswept hours of darkness, the glorious sky dazzling with the milky white grandeur of the moon and the stars swathed in the misty veil of its radiance.

Mesmerized, I stood still, admiring you - unable to take my eyes off the shimmering infinity of the silver expanse on your surface. A smile spread on my face as the wind played with my hair, kissing me tenderly and whispering in my ears the sweet salty nothings that you sent my way. You stirred a little more, engendering the half-hushed waves, of motion splashed with trembling crumbs of froth. Blended with the tranquility that knew no bounds, seeping softly in every single inch of my soul, you drenched me with your serenity and overwhelmed all my senses with your fragrance.

Thanks... Thanks a lot oh dear sea - thanks for this - for bringing peace to me where there is none and for being with me when there is no one.

Labels: happy high, Life, marine drive, mumbai, New place, ocean, random, sea, soul, think, travel, work

After a break of more than three years, I joined my dance classes back. And after an equally long time, I felt I was in tune with myself again. Although it was only for a short while, twice a week to be precise, but I was enjoying myself. I was surely happier. In the middle of everything going wrong, there was something I looked forward too.

I couldn’t have asked for more, I had my fav instructor to teach me and Shiamak was right there on the day of the show. It was a good surprise since he arrived there just before our performance began. I was all pumped up and all smiles. And it was truly unbelievable to be up there and performing again. Bliss!

The dance style I learned this time was Krumping along with popping and locking. And the song was Blue! - remixed version of the title song. We used a huge piece of satin cloth and t-shirt as our props. All thanks to Prafful's superb imagination - the choreography was unbelievably awesome... and with amazing group effort, our number was well appreciated and was one of the best that evening.

Other numbers which really impressed me was "Tu Jane na" - very romantic and beautiful, a contemporary composition - totally loved it.

And for the first time, my enthusiasm was just a tad bit less. For the first time, I did not see that familiar face in crowd - the one that was always there for all my performances. I knew it won’t be there but for some reason my eyes were still searching for it. All I want to say is that I really missed you. I miss you everyday but I missed you a lot more that day.

Only if life was fair enough, even if not completely fair.... but since its not, I am going to take this as a new beginning. Beginning of a series of performances where it’s just me - my performances will now be all mine and for me. This time around, it will be me for myself.

Labels: dance, enjoy, Fun, happy high, Life, memories, passion

Ok so am back
Back for good and back with loads of good memories...

When I landed in US, I din like anything except the cool breeze in san Diego.

Ask me now - and there is nothing that I do not like about that place.

Culture, Respect, Peace, Brother hood.... all that we talk loudly about, on top of our voices - it’s actually something they practice more than we guys do.. they are warmer, more welcoming, more respectful, and more polite than us in general.

We talk about a good routine, getting up early, having a family time etc - but that’s the last thing most of us do or follow... But in US, most ppl are in office by 7:30-8:00 AM. They work hard till 4:30-5:00 PM and then its time for family. Unlike our spoilt brats of kids here who shout n cry loudly for every little thing - the kids there are in bed before 9. I was amazed, cuz that’s the last thing I expected based on what impression we have of US culture.

Yes - the kids move out at 16-18 yrs of age and become independent. But then so what. They really know how to LIVE their life. People concentrate on themselves and so no one has time or energy to spend on getting jealous of sum1 else’s achievements or being judgmental or bad mouthing sum1. Now exceptions are there, but exceptions are not examples.

One of the things that really amazed me and left me in awe was the use of technology to provide centres like seaworld and hollywood. Just so much fun to be. Will never forgett the Shamu Show- Killer Whale show at SeaWorld and the Jurassic Park Ride at Hollywood. Yipeeeeeee!!! Jaw Droppin Stuff I say!

Another thing that I really loved there was the respect for other people and their time. Which means most people would follow rules. Almost everyone did. And so - I loved driving on the roads. Freeways were such a great experience.

I can’t even express how good it felt. One really got to be there to experience the JOY of driving and not just enjoy driving.

I have already raved about the work culture so I will now get to that one thing which I loved the most in US - LAS VEGAS - The Sin City

I am back and I love being back in India, I love being home and have my crazy family going crazy everyday. The crazy Laughter... but I just can’t get over Vegas... I guess more than the city it was me being myself totally - no restrictions no bars.... there are things I learnt about myself in 2 days which I did not know in 26yrs...just cuz I was free to take my decisions without any one looking at me and trying to judge me or sum1 pressurizing me to do sum thing. It was me being myself and there’s no greater feeling than that. And that, I owe to Vegas.

Now what happened in Vegas doesn’t necessarily have to stay in Vegas. So my Vegas story next time.... cuz it really deserves a special exclusive blog. Something I would like my kids n my grand kids to read and say - grandma was so mad... like she was so mad...LOL

But US trip can not can not end without me mentioning 3 people who really made it worthwhile!

1- Venky - Dude, u were like my guardian angel. Thanks for the calling card, the recharge, the Hollywood trip, the GPS, the daily calls, the motivation to hold on and to drive :) and an amazing weekend... :D

Aap nai hote to mera kya hota US mein..Muah

2 - Mama - I got the best gift ever in my life - The Atlanta trip and the camera, one that I had been planning to buy since whenever and now I finally have it. I can now click anything anytime, whenever I want. I got like some 700 pics although I had the camera only in the last 2 weeks... just so love it.

3 - Deanna - My client and this amazing woman. Superbly humorous and so obviously we had so many things to laugh about - specially the "Hard Disk Failure", the "Crazy Horse" and "Its Paper".... oh and the Indian - with a dot and a feather? hehehe... Thanks for being the guide Deanna... Vegas wouldn’t be half as much fun without u. Totally loved your company... THANK YOU!

Back to work now... But I'm loving it. Ting Ting TiDing!

Labels: Fun, happy high, hollywood, memories, New place, san diego, sea world, travel, trip, usa, vegas

I consumed "it" for not more than a minute and it felt like I am in a different world all together. My heart calmed down. I was neither nervous nor anxious anymore. Instead, I felt nice and mellow. A sheepish grin was plastered on my face and I felt like I am dreaming. I could hear music in my head. I looked at my friend thankfully, gave him a peck on his cheek and returned "it" to him.

Since then, "it" is the one thing that keeps me going in all circumstances. Just need a trusted source to provide "it" for me. It’s the feeling that "it" generates... the one of total euphoria.

HOLD ON HOLD ON!!! Don’t let the horses of your imagination too lose. It’s not the pot, the alcohol or the white stick... it’s more potent than any of these things. It’s a medicine for every illness - mental or physical. No other medicine works without it, and when everything fails - "it" still makes things better than they are. AH! The happy high it gives me.

They call it "The HUG Therapy"; I call it "The Human Touch"... after all, what comes from a heart, reaches a heart and the heart is what keeps us alive!!!

And I am dedicating this post especially to Samby, Sam, Arv, Keshi, and Nai...wtever happened shouldn’t have, but it also showed the amount of affection and concern blogville has... Goes to show how it doesn’t matter how you came to know sumone, if you have ever seen them or not, its really just what the heart feels - direct dil se!!

Labels: friendship, happy high, hug, human touch